Mole Loose in the City

Sarah Jessica Parker ended her relationship with her mole. Since it's making headlines it must be a slow news day.

The fact that there's even a BOOK about moles is nuts!

Bump, meet Orange Crush

I had my doctor's appointment this morning. I am almost 29 weeks and have gained 22 pounds so far in this second pregnancy. When I got there the nurse surprised me by telling me it was time to take a glucose test and that they needed me to drink Orange Crush in five minutes. THIS WAS AT 8:30AM in the morning!!! Since I had a glass of orange juice at home, I had to drink this crap. I could have avoided it if I had nothing in the morning.

But alas, I dutifully obeyed as she gave me the can of Orange Crush. I think this would be a kid's breakfast dream! You should have been there! I inhaled that sugary drink in two minutes flat! Hours later the nurse calls me at home and tells me I don't have Gestational Diabetes but that I needed to take an iron supplement every day.

OK, some of you maybe rolling eyes and thinking "What do I care about your bump picture?" Well there are pregnant women out there reading this who are interested. For those preggos who haven't reached 28 weeks yet, DO NOT EAT BREAKFAST in the morning before a glucose test or you'll have to drink orange crush!

This post contains: babies, Project Runway, wax, & ice cream

Here is the current Top Ten Most Expensive Celebrity Baby Photos list. Is paying astronomical pics of newborns going too far? I mean, you can just see the covers of People and OK! for free on the Internet! Who are buying these magazine off the supermarket racks? Soon, ultrasound photos are going to sell for $1 million! Maybe I can sell mine and pretend it's Minnie Driver's.


Photos speculating that Uma Thurman is pregnant. I don't think so. Look, it's flab! She's a grown woman that had two kids, not an anorexic fashion model!

Project Runway premieres today. I am into this show! Are you? One of the contestants is doing eco-friendly designs. Well, it's better than the girl that spat her saliva at the material, right?

This is Poetic sugar wax eyebrow stuff from Bliss ($40). I used to get my brows waxed every 6 weeks and now? It's been like months but somehow while checking in the mirror, they don't look so bad. It's not like the Keebler Elves can live on the brows like a tree yet.

Does anyone want to eat Elton John ice cream? It just came out in limited edition because he is performing in Vermont for the first time. It would be cool if they can make one for first trimester pregnancy cravings. My flavor would called "NAUSEA CHOCOLATE MUNCH" and would contain pickles, olives, chocolate, mint and potato chips! What would be in your ice cream?(P.S. Are Ben & Jerry gay?)

If there are no gays, it's not a mini San Francisco

So our mini vacation in Duluth was fun! Why the hell did we go there? Well, a few people said it was a mini San Francisco and recommended it.

Our hotel was nice as we had a 10th floor suite looking over Lake Superior. Did you know to this day, they still find dead bodies from hundreds of years ago in the lake since it's fresh water and so cold?

Walking around downtown, I noticed it was sort of run down with your local wackos hanging about. The shops along the Lakewalk had the obligatory Duluth fridge magnets and postcards. I peaked into the water to see if any human hands frozen in cubes floated about but nothing. For lunch we went to a local Greek festival with dancing people NOT smashing plates. The food on display looked generous so when we actually got our food, we realized they ripped us off on the small-size portions of the Spanokopitas and Dolmades. It was good food though but they could have piled it on for us hungry tourists! In disgust I threw my paper plate on the floor...but of course it didn't smash.

Outside of town was really nice. We stopped by a local fair at Two Harbors. On a stage, they were playing a kids version of Deal or No Deal which we thought was funny. Instead of silver cases they held up brown file folders with amounts as high as $2 on them!


When you have kid, you have to keep them busy so they pass out for a nap. Here is Toddler Mogul pretending to cook up something at the children's museum.

After he still wouldn't pass out and we didn't have an Chloroform on us, we took him on a short trolley ride. This ride was so short it would be like walking from one end of your house to the other end.

Was Duluth like a mini San Francisco? No way! Where were the gays and the rainbow banners? Where was the fish market? Where was the yummy Chinese food places?

The city is a quaint place for people to see a large body of water and who have never been to the West or East coast. Otherwise, just drive down gorgeous New England where gays and huge portions exist!

Madonna, moguls, and more

Yesterday Madonna and family took a stroll to go to the movies. Lola's pal joined along on the outing. (Does anyone have the Hard Candy CD? Is it worth getting?)

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This headline caught my attention. But it's not about me!
Drunk Mogul Loses Wedding Ring

THIS story is about me! Read The Time I Got Trashed in Cozumel!
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So you've been under a rock this weekend? Angelina had her twins, Knox and Vivienne. So Knox I understand as it goes with Maddox and Pax, but what about the normal name of Vivienne? I figured with Zahara and Shiloh, they'd go with "Shilhara" or "Zabars" (name of delicious NYC gourmet food shop!) or something like that.

Anyway, we had a FAB mini vacay and I'll be posting a few pics with how it went soon!

Winner of the $10 itunes giveaway goes to...

Motherhood for Dummies!

Congratulations! You can now download all of my personally recorded songs that I made over the weekend (just kidding, enjoy!)